18 August, 2008

Irrational fears.

I have several completely irrational fears. These include:
  • Going into the basement. (It is dark, damp and scary down there. Plus I'm always a little concerned that I'll find a homeless man sleeping down there. I don't know why.)
  • Being Carried. (I hate it. Just let me walk.)
  • Mariachi Bands. (Only once has a Mariachi band not been traumatic and that was because I was tipsy in NYC with my friends. And one of those friends was holding a large purple dildo and we were singing into it. Other than that I cringe in horror at a Mariachi band.)
  • Similarly to the Mariachi Band is anyone singing to me...with an acoustic guitar. Anything by Dave Matthews or the Birthday Song is especially horrid.
  • Butterflies Landing on me (I know, they don't even have mouths or teeth and yet it freaks me out. This is probably the most irrational of the fears. Its a butterfly!)
  • Grasshoppers. (They jump and I never know where they are going. They just freak me out!)
Today I discovered that my beautiful Zinnias are covered in grasshoppers. Some of them are little and others are behemoths of horror. I had to have Michael go out and take this photo because I didn't want to get that close. Bleck. Give me a spider any day. At least I have a general idea of where they are going. With a grasshopper you just never know.

Aren't they pretty. I love these beautiful flowers that began as a $1.25 pack of seeds.

The nasty, scary, evil grasshopper.


tonkelu said...

Know what it's thinking? "I want to eat you!"

Sorry. I couldn't help myself.

I'm not a big fan of teh grasshoppers or crickets. They're sticky and fast and they freak me out. Same for spiders. Some of those mothers can jump. But, if you really want to see me squeal and squirm, shove me out the door and next to a light swarmed by June bugs. Ew! Ew! Ew!

GreenGeek said...

I'd love to hear the story behind "is anyone singing to me..with an accountc guitar. Anything by Dave Matthews....."

Maybe by saying that you jinxed the band (http://www.dmband.com). (too soon?)